reposted in it's own entry.

[2eclipse]

so here is the question plaguing my head today: if your lover murdered someone, could you still stay with them? would it matter why they did it? what reasons could you/couldn't you cope with?

Comments

[mirage897.livejournal.com]

From dictionary.com

MURDER

The unlawful killing of one human by another, especially with premeditated malice.

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I guess the malice thing would be a problem for me. If it was 2nd degree murder (heat of the momemnt) I might be able to live with them. It would indeed matter to me why they did it. I guess the more premeditated and malicious the more I could not stand to be with that person.

More to the point....

Is Ross planning to cap or off someone? ;)

(Sorry I could not resist that last jibe)

[2eclipse.livejournal.com]

teehee. as far as i know, ross is not planning on hurting anyone, much less killing them. this is actually a response to rojir's comment about if he was cheated on as much as anything else.
however. i would STRONGLY prefer you to go with whatever YOU consider murder, rather than a dictionary def. for the purposes of this question. unless they are the same.

[mirage897.livejournal.com]

God, I hope I never seriously have to make that definition or decision based on something like this

[2eclipse.livejournal.com]

i hope you never have to. for me, anydeath that is not an accident is murder. that whole pacifism thing. and i would have big problems. but i'm not sure that i would leave someone even for intentional murder. it would depend on how they felt about what they had done.

[ventrueahole.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure that if anyone dating me decides to take a life it would be mine. I wouldn't want to stay with them after that.

[ashoe.livejournal.com]

Yes.

~a

[2eclipse.livejournal.com]

you WOULD have had the good long think required to give a short little answer like that, wouldn't you.

[keisolo.livejournal.com]

If you mean murder, classic definition? Answer would be likely no, dependent upon reasons and situation.
If you mean taking a life because morals/ethics required it within a code that would likely be shared, as anyone who qualifies as a lover for me would sort of have to... That's a different question.
I know that both myself and my partner would kill to protect our toddler, if it came down to it.

[2eclipse.livejournal.com]

this question was left intentionally vague as to what murder means. largely because to me it means taking any human life. that does not mean there is no scale of "wrong" with regard to that...but it is the only word that encompasses how i feel about taking human life and how i feel a soul that takes a life is damaged by doing so.
when i wrote this question i was fantasizing about what i would do if ross was drafted into war and would i be able to stay with him knowing he had killed in the line of duty. the answer is that i don't know. it would depend a lot on how he felt and thought about it. most of my friends don't share my problem with this.

[keisolo.livejournal.com]

I figured it was something along those lines.
Strangely enough I agree with you about a soul that takes a life being damaged by it (reference war and draft and rape comments)... but there are still circumstances in which that price must be paid.
However, I think the worst and deepest damage happens if you take a life, and do not realize that which you are taking, either because you are that warped (say - dehumanization of the enemy), or because you have a deep streak of denial that cannot allow you to think about what you have done.
Meh. There's a lot that can be said on this topic.