the darkness has not overcome it

i had the WEIRDEST dream last night.
( nonsense dream )

i got a LOT done yesterday.
i scrubbed the counters and cleaned the stove and took out the trash and the recycling and cleaned the cat boxes and made phone calls and cleaned up hair balls and made dinner and got a shower all the while felt kind of dazed and half-asleep. i am still not sleeping well (though i did get enough last night).
i also finished shadowbridge before i came to bed. it is a REALLY good book. it blends cultures in really interesting ways and leaves me wanting more. my only real gripe with it is that it doesn't really end. there is no reason for the author to end the book where he does and no signal to the reader that some major event has concluded the story. okay there is a major event, but you know so little about it that it doesn't feel conclusive in the slightest. it isn't just a cliff-hanger. it feels like a chapter ending, not a book ending. i WILL go read the next book.

( ranting here )

i was out sick yesterday.
laryngitis. better today, but still itchy throat-low energy.
still, it's amazing how a day of rest can clear your head.

and of course there is a crisis while i'm out. one of our aquisitions is throwing a tantrum because they're out of product because they didn't set up their items correctly. and of course they blame the buyer. grrr.
luckily my boss is awesome and recognizes that THEY are the problem. and AP backs her conclusion.

susan and guiness crashed again last night. i'm glad we are friends and that she trusts us and that she is slowly acclamating our cats to the presence of a dog.

i finished busman's honeymoon yesterday by dorothy sayers. i have been craving mystery lately and this was exactly what i needed. it was delightful. i will definitely read more of her books. i especially love that she challenges my french. even if she gets french chansons stuck in my head.

i decided to try to duplicate the mushroom barley soup from the cafeteria. it's that good.
i think i got pretty close.

1 smaller can of diced tomatoes
2 lbs of baby bella mushrooms sliced and stems removed
1 onion diced
2 carrots sliced small
1 turnip sliced small
1 celery stalk sliced (or in a pinch 1 Tbs celery seed)
2 bay leaves
2 Tbs thyme
1 cup fresh chopped parsley
1 cup pearl barley
1 quart vegetable broth
2 Tbs tamari
1 Tbs worcester
1/4 cup sherry
1 quart water
2 Tbs olive oil
salt and pepper to taste

in a deep saucepan, fry onions in olive oil. add carrots, turnip and celery and cook until soft. add mushrooms water, broth and tomatoes. bring to a boil and add sherry, tamari, worcester, barley, bay and thyme. cook for at least one half hour. add parsley, salt, pepper and more tamari if desired. serves 10.

also i have made some progress on the shawl
( click for pictures )

it is snowing in minnesota.
it snowed yesterday breifly as well.
it is starting to feel like the time where there should not be snow (to me). but i definitely also have enough sweaters to take care of any of my problems with the cold, which is good because we are supposed to get still more snow this week.
i pity the poor people living on the red river valley.

i had my first class for literacy tutoring monday night. it was okay, i guess. i think i will like tutoring better than i like the class. that being said, i didn't expect there to be math involved. HEY. i signed up to teach LITERACY. not math.
but it looks like a fair componant of this training revolves around the GED. hence the math. i can choose where i volunteer, so i won't have to tutor for the GED, but they train us in that anyway. so i got a few good ideas and became thoroughly convinced that i have forgotten any math i ever knew. seriously? i don't remember what a medium is, or how to calculate the circumference of a circle. pretty basic stuff - but i never use it, so of course it doesn't stay in my brain. it probably doesn't help that i don't like it to begin with. volunteers for literacy have to take 12 hours of training in order for the minnesota literacy council to get federal funding. this is annoying to me, because while the book they gave us is helpful, i think i could probably get everything i need from say, an hour and a half of class plus the book. it's not horrible, but i feel like my time could be better spent actually helping people. also the class is twice a week, and while i'm glad to get it done, i have SO much to do in my "real life" that i don't appreciate the time drain. maybe i shouldn't be so cynical. the next classes may be better. 3 more to go. next one is tonight.

i am still really feeling it that i stayed up til 2 am playing computer games with ross and co saturday night. i think i needed more nap time this week.
also i'm getting next to no knitting done.

yesterday i went to the gym, got in a great workout and renewed my membership for the next 3 months. i find that i am more motivated to work out if there is money involved. granted, i have yet to go 3x in a week. but there have been several where i've gone 2x. and this is still better than just the morning sit-ups.
i also got one of the cat boxes clean (need more cat litter for the 2nd) and played more games with ross. poor ross. one of the servers at the guthrie went down last night and he didn't come to bed until 6:15 this morning. i am guessing he was up most of the night working on fixing it. the effect of this on me is that the cats get rowdy and think it is time for them to be fed if there is activity in the bedroom any time between 5:30 and 6:30 - which effectively robs me of sleep. we will need to find a solution to this. like kicking them out earlier if he is coming to bed that late.

i need to schedule in some down-time. i have had next to no time to read or knit. gaming is nice and i have a good time, but it doesn't feel like down time to me. it feels like being social.

it is snowing in minnesota, but not for long. it will shortly be too warm for snow and we will just have dreariness.
i should get some seeds put out in my barrel-halves.

i just feel like i'm constantly doing too much.
and instead of building myself up to do cool things i'm struggling to keep up with my life. i used to have solid weeks of one or two evening things and lots of down-time in between. errands count as an evening thing. so do chores that take more than 5 minutes (so vaccumming and dusting count, but taking the trash out, or emptying the dishwasher does not). the pile-up of my life has left it's excrement all over my desk. i need to spend a weekend organizing, but i don't have a weekend to spend on it.
wah wah wah.
yes i would like some cheese.
honestly things seem pretty good. i'm just irritated and stressed and i can't put my finger on why and that bothers me.
i went to the gym yesterday and had a nice workout. i figured out what i did to mess up my ipod and fixed it.
i have increased the size of my aeolian shawl by a factor of 8 - but it is still small.
i had a lovely evening at the library and got some books and worked on ross's hat at met up wit him and ross and adele at washington square while they had dinner.
i have no reason to complain really. it's just creepy to feel so unsettled.

i heard part of barak obama's press conference on the way to the bar last night. i was struck with the shock of having the president come on the air without my dreading it and changing the station. it would be enough for me simply not to be embarrassed by the man who represents our country. i would have settled for that. but to actually be impressed by him when he speaks? i'm still not over it.

it is around 40 degrees here but its supposed to rain...
i am going to celebrate by going to the gym, hanging out with friends and working on my exciting aeolian shawl!
i cast on last night.
and made...very little progress. but still SOME progress. it kinda looks like cat yak. but all lace looks like cat yak before it is blocked and i can see the suggestion of what it will be. i am SO excited.
spinning group is tomorrow and i'm looking forward to that too. and hopefully working on the surprise i am making for ross's birthday.

also i decided what to do about my co-worker who was pissing me off with how she treated her cat. i e-mailed one of the nutritional specialists at the UofM small animal clinic and asked her to point me in the direction of articles/write-ups of specifics on how too many kittens can hurt mama kitty. then i'm going to forward the articles to my co-worker. that way i don't look like an unproffessional asshole and i still get my point across.

l (coworker): oh yes, we have a cat. she is such a sweetie. her name is swannie. and you know we just moved back into our house. we moved out so that we could fix it up and we just moved back. we left her there while we were gone. there's a barn there and we keep a cat door there for her. she's a good hunter and keeps all the mice away. sometimes she scares the neighbors though. she had frostbite on her ears so she's just got little nubs of ears left. and we have a dog. he just loves her. he picks her up by the neck and shakes her. and you'd think she'd smack him, but she just takes it. they have kind of a weird relationship. only she has kittens every year and one time when she was pregnant she got up on the tractor and got away from him. we have coyotes and such in the area so the kitties don't normally last long.
me: you know it's really bad for her to have kittens every year. it takes a lot of nutrients out of the mama's body and can really wear her out.
l: well we like to keep a kitty or two.
me: yes, but you want to keep HER, don't you? having kittens every year will kill her. ask your vet if you don't believe me. it will do the same to us. i know a guy who's grandmother had 14 kids and she wound up in a wheelchair and eventually died because the nutrition had been leeched out of her body. the babies always come first.
l: well our vet, he's not really a cat person.
me: well maybe you ought to get a vet who is a cat person

i just feel sick hearing this kind of thing and i hear it ALL THE DAMN TIME!!!

is there a special hell for people who don't care for their pets? please God let people FEEL the abuse and/or neglect they inflict on their animals and learn from it before they can come into your glory.

dear leto.

what is it with the feet?
my feet will not pet you.
my feet will not feed you.
my feet will most certainly not play with you.
my feet? really they are not interested in you at all.
in fact they regularly trip over you and kick you by accident as a result of your swooning all over them.
feet?
seriously?
wtf cat?


your confused mom.

today truly is a happy friday.
first it is the birthday of kurusawa2005 and ventrueahole
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUYS!!!!

second. it's friday. what's not to love about friday.
third. we are going to jerad and rachel's for dinner and games tonight. it will be good to see them.
forth. SOMEONE on ravelry MADE MY MONTH yesterday. remember i was drooling over that lace pattern and lusting after mahogany over marmalade (orange brown) silk lace that i can never afford ravelry link here? someone on ravelry heard my woe and offered to trade me for two skeins of sock yarn and $20 over paypal. my world is complete! i'm going to actually GET my silky buttery exquisiteness! ~raptures~ 1000 yards!!!! i'm going to roll in it. this means i've got the makings for 2, possibly 3 incredible lace shawls. no one should be THIS happy about yarn. but i am. i have a day full of happy fiber fantasies ahead of me.
those of you who are knitters will understand. for the sake of those of you who are not, i will continue on about other things.
fifth. our friends anne and russ got a big-ass lcd tv that is way better and bigger than ours. it had a factory defect. a small place at the bottom of the screen is incompletely covered by one of the layers of coating. anne didn't even notice it, but russ did. they called the company, who sent them a new one and didn't ask for the old one back. they are therefore selling it to us for a STEAL. finally we can get rid of the monstrosity that ross and i can barely lift together and that takes ridiculous space and leaves permanant impressions on our carpet!!! and it will do all kinds of technical things that will make ross happy. i like it when ross is happy.

i went to the gym yesterday, so i feel great today, if a bit sore. i went to spinning class, which i had been missing for a while. i need new gym shoes.
the ones i have are weird in the toes and gradually cut off my circulation during my workout. it changes a little depending on how much time i spend on my toes during my workout. yesterday's was good. the instructor worked us harder than she has in the past. the only thing that sucked is the endless techno. now i don't mind electronic music. i've occasionally been known to listen to it on purpose. but not a whole 45 minutes worth with only 3 tracks! i depend on change of music during my work out to distract my brain from the pain of the workout. and this stuff was just NOT interesting enough. i mentioned it to the instructor as a suggestion? and she (who is maybe 18) talked to me like i was an imbecile who knows nothing about music, telling me it is an "aquired taste" like enjoying music that never changes and has no lyrics makes her a better person. i find sentiments like this disgusting.

ross is still fighting off a migraine from yesterday. i came home and he was sick on the couch, poor guy. i therefore had to make him spaghetti and meatsauce and garlic bread and rub his neck. i so rarely get the opportunity to really take care of him and go the extra mile (like an extra trip out for garlic bread), that i treasure times like this. i am not happy that he hurts, but i am happy that i get to show him how i love him, not just tell him.

we watched crash last night. man what a star-studded cast!
( crash movie review )

at somepoint this weekend i still hope to see watchmen. i don't expect to like it. i do expect to get a better feel for the story, and movies made from non-traditional comics. we also plan to get together with darla and john and play board games at some point. these things will be good.

i wish everyone as awesome a friday as i am having. :)

and then it snowed.
and all you people complaining about winter in other states get NO sympathy from me because it is -2 degrees here with a -23 degree windchill and i have errands to run after work, a father-in-law at my house, ross's brakes locked up again and i REALLY just want some peace and quiet.
really i'm more annoyed with the combination of lack of peace and quiet and ice than with just the ice.

ross and i had a lovely evening with john and darla last night over at their place. they are great people. or at least it was great until ross's brakes locked up and i had to go get him and then remembered that the sink was still full of dirty dishes and came home to find out that one of the cats threw up on the carpet. sigh.

i'm supposed to get together with renee today, but i just don't think it is going to work.