![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
everything is squared away for my graduation.
the regalia is ordered.
the payment plan is put together (and mostly finished)
the transcripts are sent and accepted at wesley.
and my folks have agreed to drop a quarter by the library.
ross and i paid my library fines, but apparently they decided to charge me interest at the last moment. it would cost us more to mail them a quarter than the quarter itself.
i had something of a disturbing day yesterday.
first it was snowing. on easter. i'm not a fan.
second, ross failed to understand that it was important to my happiness that he go to church with me on easter and xmas. i don't ask him to go with me most of the time. he has his own faith and i respect that. but we didn't communicate adequately and he wished he had gone with me later.
we DID have an excellent theological discussion afterward...but it was an upsetting one for me, because sometimes he knows me better than i know myself. he thinks i need a church that is a spiritual haven, not some place i have to fight to get accepted. sure any church i belong to is going to have difficulties, but he doesn't like the energy at white bear and thinks i shouldn't have to go in already fighting. no matter how much i like the associate pastor, that doesn't change the attitude of the congregation....and i mostly agree with him and that hurts some.
he thinks i am trying to be everything and am therefore not getting my spiritual needs met. he is probably right.
i also missed my parents and that made me mad. i feel like i am encouraging my mother every time i admit that i miss her. it is a problem.
my windsheild broke on my car and while it IS 100% insured it still sucks to have to deal with it.
i'm worried about madeleine because she seems...just not her self. not as pesty and demanding. then this morning i discovered a bump on her gum. i wonder if it is an absess. i am going to make an appt. with the vet for her.
my jeans ripped, which means i need to buy new jeans, which got me thinking about clothes shopping and how i don't like how i fit in clothes right now...
really, there was just a lot of small stuff making me grumpy. i got over it..but then it got worse.
ross and i watched a movie that really upset me. a perfect world with kevin costner and clint eastwood. the first part of it was great, but the last part of it was so...human and painful and it really wrecked the happiness of the first half of the movie. i wound up upset all over again and it was more work to get myself out of it. i couldn't get that sad, upsetting ending out of my head. it was too real. and i couldn't do anything about it. i have the best, most understanding husband in the world. he gave me the space i needed and the affection i needed and then we enjoyed the rest of the evening together...
my dreams last night...reflected the movie, and my worry over madeleine...and the child of some friends. the re-occurring theme was that i was responsible and bad things kept happening beyond my control. from cedar ending up alone by himself in my parent's basement with the lights out to 15 small helpless cats outside my house with no one else to feed them....it was not a good sleep situation last night.
the regalia is ordered.
the payment plan is put together (and mostly finished)
the transcripts are sent and accepted at wesley.
and my folks have agreed to drop a quarter by the library.
ross and i paid my library fines, but apparently they decided to charge me interest at the last moment. it would cost us more to mail them a quarter than the quarter itself.
i had something of a disturbing day yesterday.
first it was snowing. on easter. i'm not a fan.
second, ross failed to understand that it was important to my happiness that he go to church with me on easter and xmas. i don't ask him to go with me most of the time. he has his own faith and i respect that. but we didn't communicate adequately and he wished he had gone with me later.
we DID have an excellent theological discussion afterward...but it was an upsetting one for me, because sometimes he knows me better than i know myself. he thinks i need a church that is a spiritual haven, not some place i have to fight to get accepted. sure any church i belong to is going to have difficulties, but he doesn't like the energy at white bear and thinks i shouldn't have to go in already fighting. no matter how much i like the associate pastor, that doesn't change the attitude of the congregation....and i mostly agree with him and that hurts some.
he thinks i am trying to be everything and am therefore not getting my spiritual needs met. he is probably right.
i also missed my parents and that made me mad. i feel like i am encouraging my mother every time i admit that i miss her. it is a problem.
my windsheild broke on my car and while it IS 100% insured it still sucks to have to deal with it.
i'm worried about madeleine because she seems...just not her self. not as pesty and demanding. then this morning i discovered a bump on her gum. i wonder if it is an absess. i am going to make an appt. with the vet for her.
my jeans ripped, which means i need to buy new jeans, which got me thinking about clothes shopping and how i don't like how i fit in clothes right now...
really, there was just a lot of small stuff making me grumpy. i got over it..but then it got worse.
ross and i watched a movie that really upset me. a perfect world with kevin costner and clint eastwood. the first part of it was great, but the last part of it was so...human and painful and it really wrecked the happiness of the first half of the movie. i wound up upset all over again and it was more work to get myself out of it. i couldn't get that sad, upsetting ending out of my head. it was too real. and i couldn't do anything about it. i have the best, most understanding husband in the world. he gave me the space i needed and the affection i needed and then we enjoyed the rest of the evening together...
my dreams last night...reflected the movie, and my worry over madeleine...and the child of some friends. the re-occurring theme was that i was responsible and bad things kept happening beyond my control. from cedar ending up alone by himself in my parent's basement with the lights out to 15 small helpless cats outside my house with no one else to feed them....it was not a good sleep situation last night.
no subject
no subject
a big part of it is that i think the UMC does music better than any other church hands down.
another part of it is their social justice creed (see below).
but a lot of it is that the UMC seems squarely in the middle for me. it is both sacramental and evangelical. it brings together many of the traditions of lutheranism, roman catholicism, anabaptism and calvinism - kinda like a mutt brings together the best qualities of the parents while an over-bred dog can get inbred?
also i like its trinitarianism, that it's background is firmly rooted in commitment to the poor even though it hasn't always followed that as it should, and that it isn't afraid to emphasize works, while still giving them second place to faith.
honestly, john wesley was a seriously worth-while guy. is sermons are brilliant, interesting and not over anyone's head. he was a man intensely interested in faithful life. if you have a chance to read some of his sermons from the library, i think you would get the feel for why i admire him.
We believe in God, Creator of the world; and in Jesus Christ, the Redeemer of creation. We believe in the Holy Spirit, through whom we acknowledge God’s gifts, and we repent of our sin in misusing these gifts to idolatrous ends.
We affirm the natural world as God’s handiwork and dedicate ourselves to its preservation, enhancement, and faithful use by humankind.
We joyfully receive for ourselves and others the blessings of community, sexuality, marriage, and the family.
We commit ourselves to the rights of men, women, children, youth, young adults, the aging, and people with disabilities; to improvement of the quality of life; and to the rights and dignity of racial, ethnic, and religious minorities.
We believe in the right and duty of persons to work for the glory of God and the good of themselves and others and in the protection of their welfare in so doing; in the rights to property as a trust from God, collective bargaining, and responsible consumption; and in the elimination of economic and social distress.
We dedicate ourselves to peace throughout the world, to the rule of justice and law among nations, and to individual freedom for all people of the world.
We believe in the present and final triumph of God’s Word in human affairs and gladly accept our commission to manifest the life of the gospel in the world. Amen.
From The Book of Discipline of The United Methodist Church - 2000. Copyright 2000 by The United Methodist Publishing House.